Kundalini will sometimes deprive a person of experiences and conditions that would take their attention away from their spiritual development. Being extremely beautiful or focused only on money or a hedonistic lifestyle. This is not the truth of who you are it is merely the paradigm of consciousness that Grace has given you to awaken within. So do not hold a grudge against yourself for not achieving what others may have expectation for you to achieve friends family, etc. as they do not understand the purpose for limitations that have been given to you in this life from the divine.

You must begin to forgive yourself and accept your self as you are. There is nothing wrong for you. You have been given a very specific body and mind and gifts to do a very specific thing, a very specific task. That task is to weave together a life that is imbued with the strength and love and trust and the honoring of the truth within you that surpasses the physical expression of who you are or who you or others think you should be.

This means that no matter what was given that it does not represent the truth of who you are. The truth of who you are is the grace that is awakening with in you.
Life isn't supposed to be perfect to begin with, that's what karma is representing, the imperfection of life, but your journey through it and the knowledge that you gain from self mastery is what brings perfection to life. Kundalini in the awakened expression.
As you continue to move into forgiveness and love for who you are and how you are the wisdom of that love will begin to bring you the gifts of awakening. - chrism